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February 6, 2015 • Cee • Reviews

Daniel Handler - We Are Pirates

We Are Pirates by Daniel Handler
February 3, 2015
Bloomsbury USA
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Amazon | Barnes & Noble | The Book Depository
*ARC courtesy of Lauren Cerand

Mega-bestselling author Daniel Handler (aka Lemony Snicket) gives us his long-awaited and most ambitious novel yet: a dark, rollicking, stunningly entertaining human comedy.

A boat has gone missing. Goods have been stolen. There is blood in the water. It is the twenty-first century and a crew of pirates is terrorizing the San Francisco Bay.

Phil is a husband, a father, a struggling radio producer, and the owner of a large condo with a view of the water. But he’d like to be a rebel and a fortune hunter.

Gwen is his daughter. She’s fourteen. She’s a student, a swimmer, and a best friend. But she’d like to be an adventurer and an outlaw.

Phil teams up with his young, attractive assistant. They head for the open road, attending a conference to seal a deal.

Gwen teams up with a new, fierce friend and some restless souls. They head for the open sea, stealing a boat to hunt for treasure.

We Are Pirates is a novel about our desperate searches for happiness and freedom, about our wild journeys beyond the boundaries of our ordinary lives.

Also, it’s about a teenage girl who pulls together a ragtag crew to commit mayhem in the San Francisco Bay, while her hapless father tries to get her home.


First Sentence:

I met Phil Needle on Independence Day, two hundred something-something years since America had freed itself from British rule and just a few days after the pirates had returned from the high seas, at a barbecue commemorating that troubled time.

Who’s up for an adventure on the open seas? You? Well, bad news, We Are Pirates is not that kind of book. However, if you’re looking for an extremely dark, yet somewhat humorous story about desperate people trying to escape their reality by turning to piracy whilst calling it an adventure, you’re in luck!

We Are Pirate follows a father, Phil Needle, and his daughter, Gwen, as they both embark on a journey for meaning in their lives. For Phil, who’s a radio producer and a clueless dad, he wants to create a meaningful radio program that will embody the American outlaw spirit and inspire audiences. For Gwen, a fourteen year, she’s extremely unhappy with her family, her love life, and, in general, her life, and yearns for more meaning and freedom, which is why she puts together a crew of similarly restless souls to create mayhem in the San Francisco Bay.

It explores what happens to restless souls when they try to find meaning and freedom in their lives by stepping out of their reality. Prepare to join the adventure!

Five Things That Make We Are Pirates Fascinating

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September 11, 2014 • Cee • Letters

Dear Daniel Handler and We Are Pirates,

God damn, I need We Are Pirates. I need it like I need the air for breathing or food for energy or books for entertainment or faces to scream over. The point is, I really need this book.


Welllllllll, I’m glad you ask.

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November 25, 2013 • Cee • Reviews

lemonysnicket-tcidThe Composer Is Dead by Lemony Snicket
March 3, 2009
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Amazon | Barnes & Noble | The Book Depository

There’s dreadful news from the symphony hall—the composer is dead!

If you have ever heard an orchestra play, then you know that musicians are most certainly guilty of something. Where exactly were the violins on the night in question? Did anyone see the harp? Is the trumpet protesting a bit too boisterously?

In this perplexing murder mystery, everyone seems to have a motive, everyone has an alibi, and nearly everyone is a musical instrument. But the composer is still dead.

Perhaps you can solve the crime yourself. Join the Inspector as he interrogates all the unusual suspects. Then listen to the accompanying audio recording featuring Lemony Snicket and the music of Nathaniel Stookey performed by the San Francisco Symphony. Hear for yourself exactly what took place on that fateful, well-orchestrated evening.


First sentence: “The composer is dead.”

Lemony Snicket continues to win my hearts! The Composer Is Dead is so delightful! It has the same Lemony Snicket wit I’m used to – funny and macabre-esque.

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February 28, 2013 • Cee • Discussion


Today is one of my childhood hero/greatest person in the world/one of my favorite author’s birthday!

If there was no Daniel Handler in the world, we wouldn’t have his lovely creation The Basic Eight (that was rejected 37 times) or the infamous Lemony Snicket and his A Series of Unfortunate Events. 

To end this post, have some wonderful Daniel Handler/Lemony Snicket quotes.

  • Never trust anyone who has not brought a book with them.
  • Writing a book is always a tightrope walk, and always feels strange — one must care about something so thoroughly, in an embryonic state, that one has made up to begin with.
  • Eavesdrop a lot and take notes. It’s a way to begin to think about how the world around you is made of stories.
  • There are many, many types of books in the world, which makes good sense, because there are many, many types of people, and everybody wants to read something different.
  • All the secrets of the world are contained in books. Read at your own risk.
  • Wicked people never have time for reading. It’s one of the reasons for their wickedness.